Numbers

Numbers make me sick.
Numbers more than 4 digits with a symbol in front of it,
especially when it involves deadlines.
Sick.
To solve those number, I have to look through my phonebook,
translate those numbers and send it to the number I found.
Awaiting reply from THAT number.
Waiting..
counting days also involved numbers.
When the number gets bigger,
I get sicker.
My heart will beat faster,
Possiblities and chances turned into percentage in number.
Then when I am sick,
I have a book beside me with a bunch of graphs,
telling me that in less than 24 hours I will be sitting in class 511,
doing questions,
and pray to God that it will result in good numbers.
But I can't think well for now,
can't stop thinking of those numbers I have in the beginning.
Numbers lead by a symbol.

Detoxification Failure

It is 12 :18 a.m and I seriously need to go to bed now.
Otherwise, I will not be able to wake up tomorrow for my 8 a.m. Philosophy class.
And if I failed to make it to my Phil 40 class, I'll be very upset.
Why?
Because I have spent the last 2 hours working on the puzzle :D
Anyway,
I felt like a big cheat today.
Like,
REALLY BIG!
I ate a salmon, why? blame Cheesecake Factory for having chicken in all their salads.
So I had the herb-crusted salmon salad instead.
I had a bunch of carbs too!
Why?
'Cause Bryan, the server, was so nice, he brought me a bunch of yummy bread.
So Day 3 of detoxification was a total failure.
I guess now I have my "cheat of the day"
But today was seriously bad,
I can't even tell you what I ate after that for the rest of the day.
It was bad...

Okay, I really have to sleep now,
I just wanna share this awesome book that I just bought today with 30% discount from Borders.
Double the AWEsomeness.
I found it lost at the alley of Young Adult non-fiction section.
I seriously think "she" does not belong to that part of the bookstore.

It is called the Teen Vogue Handbook
it is..
inspiring..

Detoxification Cont'd

HELLO WORLD!!
I just succeeded 2nd day of detoxification with a little cheat :D
Day 1 was,
watermelon, berries, apples, water and water.....
I waited 30 minutes for my bus after work, I wished I could go and get my milk tea to kill some time..
But I could not.
So I waited and waited.. "Should I get a milk tea? Hmm"
Anyway, I almost frozen dead but I survived!
Day 2,
Baked Potato, cabbage soup, cabbage soup, and baby carrots.
I wanted to cheat so bad!
So I went to get a coffee before work, with some SUGAR!!!!
I also had a salad which was really good, or maybe I was just hungry.
I don't know if the vinegar dressing is following my plan rules,
but anyway there was also avocado and a finger-sized bread.
So I guess I cheated again :(

I guess it's fine :) Tomorrow is Veggie and Fruity day. Can't wait for day 5 when I can start having some fish for meals. I might cheat again tomorrow, I seriously don't take this thing seriously, haha!

Detoxification

Everybody say "DETOX!"
I am not planning to go on diet, I am just going to do some detox which is necessary.
Today was supposed to be my first day, almost made a good start, but failed in the end.
Started morning with grapes. Lunch was 2 fruit bowls full of watermelon and loupe.
Okay, things were going pretty well.
Then I started to get really hungry, I thought a little cheat won't harm.
So...
I grabbed a handful of tortilla chips and munched on them.
Everything still tasted healthy, unlike potato chips.
I put myself in denial mode. Obviously, my detox plan had failed.
Friend told me I should just give up today and start my day 1 all over again tomorrow.
It sucks eating fruits whole day and then some tortilla chips just came and turned my efforts into nothing :(
Alright, plan failed. Grab some noodle, some dumpling and had my dinner.
There was a cookie, I ate them too.
I have some soy milk left, drank them.
I've just bought two bags full of veggies, so I guess Imma start to do this again tomorrow.
Let's hope it works.

Day 1 : all fruits
Day 2: all veggies
DAy 3: combination on veggie n fruits.
Day 4 : bananas n milk

From Day 5 onwards, I'll have some meat on the menu :)

Let's do this!

Happy Thursday

Have I told you about Happy Thursday?

Well, earlier this semester, I don't know how, but somehow I ended up with two jobs and I've been working my ass out 7 days a week since then. After long time of persuading and begging, I finally got my Thursday off. Thursday is finally a work-free day,and so I called it Happy Thursday. I've tried very hard to make the best out of the most waited day of the week, although sometimes I failed, but I had a really good Thursday today :)

Early morning Lucy called me, told me about her sprained and swollened thumb, that she could not work and needed me to cover her shift. Sad. Disappointed. Sad. Sad.

Oh, how could you took my Thursday away from me..........................................

But there was hope, I knew that God won't be so cruel to me.

Then Lucy called again, missed it. I called her back, she missed it. Finally she left me a voice message and I listened with fingers crossed. Yipeeeeeeeee!! It was a good good news, that voice call made my day :D

Class was over at 12 p.m. Had lunch at Thai House Express, Tom Yum noodle with extra pork balls. Movies, Whip it finally. Karaoke at Fillmore. Dinner at Spices, chicken wings, pig ear, pig intestine, corn soup I MISS U!!! and milk tea at Quickly. What could be better? When my tummy is filled with good food, I am happy. Singing makes me happy too!!!

Oh at least I have forgotten about all the stresses for the past 12 hours :)

Voila!

Hey baby BLOG! I have neglected you for quite a while, or should I say it's been a while since the last time I wrote to you. Pimples popping, muffin top growing, and my mouth can't seem to stop munching on something. This is what you called as STRESS. Watching the clock ticking so fast is driving me even more crazy. I'm running out of time, so many things to do, so little time to get it done.

What causes this breakout? Don't blame in totally on the oily fried chicken I just had. Blame it on me spending too much time doing nothing, me not noting well what's going on, me who is too afraid to confront things directly, me too slake-y me too lazy. I'm busy, yes I am, busy working. Working does pay me in paper, money. But my other papers are not going well, nothing to put in my resume, not doing well in classes this semester, and going to SFSU in 2 months is just stressing. Knowing that I have to pay all the fees before I go in there is even more stressin'. I've been thinking about passing this news to my father, news about me have not told him about this semester's fees and me just found out about next semester's fees. When fees piled up, they are HUGE!

So just last week Vinnie told me she was moving out! I am losing my housemate, I better find someone else to replace her, or find somewhere else to re-place myself. I will definitely prefer re-placing myself to a better place. This area of muchos amigos is freakin' me out, I don't wanna be friend with amigo who stands in front of his house everyday give u goodbye kisses and "Take care" as you passed by. That guy who seem to say the same thing every time I walked by is definitely ill. I wanna move to Sunset, because everybody lives in Sunset, all friends, co-workers and classmates. I wanna join them in the Sunset fog! I will love it cause I love FOG!!!!! :D I've been imagining myself jogging around Golden Gate Park, drinking coffee and do some reading at the cafe, have lunch with friends and there it goes another good day at Sunset. I'm still working on my Sunset dream..... dreamm..

So what else is stressin' me out? My Philosophy lecturer, Stephan Johnson, hates me, because I never show up in his class. Deborah Goldsmith does not like me because I gave her lame excuse for being late, and I left early. Arthur Pines think I am a bad Technical Director. Cecil Hale and Sheila McFarland might not even remember me. OH MY GOODNESS!

I am so stress, all I can do is eat, eating makes me happy. But post-eating is not fun, I keep thinking about the extra fat but somehow I have no time to work out and burn those extra fat :( I have not gone to gym for 2 months now, I should have frozen my account, I still gave myself hope that I am about to go, I should work out this weekend, I had plans, but none of them went well. So here I am, thinking again... what should I do next?

The Sigh Sigh Lulaby

I am officially worried, scared and confused right now. After mid-term last week, I felt like I've been hit by a huge rock. Starring at the paper with my mind blank I realized how bad the situation was. I don't know if it is caused purely by my stupidity or is it really that hard? But no matter what, I know working 20 hours pay a contribution in this matter. I realized that none of my teachers this semester is liking me, they don't seem to give a damn about me. I am officially being included in the category of lazy students, who either show up late or does not show up at all in class. What the hell is wrong with me? Is it too late to catch up? Or am I being to caught up with having a bunch of new friends and having too much fun? I don't know, I am so scared, yet I am not motivated enough. I am too scared to take action, what should I do know? Well, I guess I know what I should do, but I dare not to. :(